It makes me not want to go.” It’s clear this really affects some women. These incidents are examples of the worst type of bullying at gyms, and would make anyone feel uncomfortable. “I find all the men flirt with the women and it distracts from their training,” says Durkin.
But how much of it is deliberate intimidation, and how much is paranoia? My partner finds the guys try and intimidate her when she’s at the gym. They won’t let the women join in.” Tim Walker, founder of Evolution of Man fitness, tells me his girlfriend had a similar experience at a mixed gym in London: “She was trying to squat and a guy said, 'what are you doing here? “If a man thinks a women’s attractive, he’ll flirt.
“But the men stop what they’re doing and look at you with a smug smile and that bums me out so much. I won’t stop running up and down that thing just because they’re staring at me as if what I’m doing is out of the ordinary or unladylike.
F*** that.” Goulding doesn’t let it get her down - but that’s probably because she’s a famous pop star. Friends tell me the thought of men staring at them has put them off trying anything but the treadmill in the gym.
For most of them, conservative wallflowers are likely to be a better bet in the long run.
A study recently published in the European Journal of Social Psychology reports that men experience feelings of anxiousness while dating sexually aggressive women.
These are things that I admire and wish I saw in myself. But sometimes I wonder if my quippy response is correct; is it really intimidation that keeps the men from my fabulous friends?
And if they are intimidated, is that good intimidation (as I suspect), or is it more of a turn-off thing?
The other theory stems from men getting squirmy over role reversals between the two genders.
His response: “Men are lazy.” I thought his honesty was refreshing (heck, sexy even) at first. Why are men still looking at women with disabilities like we are weak creatures, confined to our beds all day, helpless and dependent on others for every little need, unable to work? Women with disabilities are everywhere, and everywhere you want to be, so you just might as well stop even trying to outrun us. The look makes me feel like I’m some sort of freak of nature.
Here was a guy with enough decency to be open and honest with me instead of placating me and treating me like a breakable, fragile China doll. Sometimes it’s impossible to believe that I could have a chance for love in the “real world.” I may be different, but I still fall asleep at night dreaming of someone lying next to me, someone who sees me and not just my disability.
[My girlfriends] see this in a positive light..of them wish they had more of a backbone and ask for my advice on how to emulate my demeanor." Katie: "I'm very direct.
I can say no easily."Jennie: "My friends think I am intimidating because I work in a corporate business environment which would at times be associated with rigor/aggressive natured people.